Getting knocked down isn’t the problem …

Everyone’s life is peppered with adversity. Doesn’t matter whether you’re famous, or rich, or renowned in some field. Doesn’t matter if you front the most famous band in the world, or your face adorns a thousand glossy magazines. Doesn’t matter whether you were brought up in poverty or with a silver spoon in your mouth, or whether you even knew your parents. Everyone, from every background, will meet with obstacles along the way. Everyone. This isn’t exactly breaking news, to be perfectly honest, in fact it’s pretty well known. When we’re in the middle of it, though, it can feel like we’re the only one. The feeling is “Why me? Life seems to be picking on me, as though I’ve got a big KICK ME sign taped on my back. What have I done to deserve all this?” Well, you didn’t have to do anything special. Just be born. That was enough. Problems come into all our lives. Along with setbacks, upsets, disappointments, illness, pain, loss … the list goes on and on. Come a bit closer, I want to whisper to you … it’s a secret … listen carefully … it happens to us all. Yeah okay, it’s not a secret, I was just dramatising. But it’s a fact, it happens to us all, every last one of us. Princes and paupers alike, we all get a slap from the setback stick. No-one escapes it, doesn’t matter who you are. There … now you know … sorry if it’s come as a bit of a shock to you, but, you know, there goes life again, dealing out little shocks all the time just to make sure you’re paying attention.

It’s what you do when you’re down that matters

The thing that really matters is not meeting with setbacks along the way (like I said, happens to us all), it’s how you deal with those setbacks. That’s what makes all the difference. Whether you let them knock you down and just lie there, trying to rub the pain away and feeling sorry for yourself, or get right back up and face the situation. That’s the deciding factor in whether you’re going to make some headway in life, or just settle back into an introverted, blaming-the-world type of misery.

That’s why fighting is such a great analogy for life, and why boxing fascinates us so much. We can watch trained boxers pit their wits and strength against each other, and see how they deal with what comes at them, without the associated danger of actually getting involved. Boxing’s easy, see, if you’re fit and strong and you train hard, and as long as everything’s going your way. But there’s always an unknown quantity in the ring with you … your opponent. No matter how big and strong you are, no matter how much road work you’ve put in, no matter how many times you’ve pounded that heavy big with all the force you could muster … if the other guy lands a sneaky punch in just the right place, at just the right moment, it’s all for nothing … you’re goin’ down! Even the greats, the champions, they get hit, they feel the sickening, nausea-inducing crunch of fist on jaw, and they lose it, like we all do. They stumble and fall, struggling to maintain balance. They experience the disorienting loss of control, the pain, the crack of landing hard on the canvas. And in those confused, blurry moments, they’re faced with the same choice we all have to face, from time to time. They have to try to gather their wits, to reform and re-organise their resources, and to fight the impulse to stay there, where it feels safe.

A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for ~ J. A. Shedd

They have to force themselves to get back up, even though they feel that all that torturous training was for nothing and they’ve failed. They have to dig deep and make this the fight of their lives. And they’ve got to come back stronger than ever, if they ever hope to win.

You have to get back up, time after time

This is so much like life that we can’t take our eyes off a good fight. Even if you’re not familiar with the two guys in the ring, and even if you don’t really like boxing, it’s hard to drag your eyes away from it. It’s compelling! And it’s because it’s life, in the raw, right there in front of you, distilled into two struggling opponents, each battling for supremacy, and ultimately, for survival. It’s the story of all of us, every day of our lives. We try, we make plans, we struggle, we meet with setbacks and sometimes we feel like we’ve literally being knocked back and landed hard on the canvas. But we have to shake it off and get back up, because that’s the only choice there is, unless you want to quit. Life is hard. There will be pain. There will be blood. You will get knocked down. It will happen again and again. No matter how strong you are, you will meet your match. You will find yourself on the canvas, looking up at the misty, swirling faces above you. You will feel the shame and humiliation of defeat. These are the facts of life. No-one warns you about them, but you kinda learn them as you go along. And what makes you a survivor, and a winner, is getting back up every time, and facing life square-on. It’s not getting knocked down that makes you a loser, it’s not getting back up. I just watched a short video on YouTube, dealing with this idea. It’s based on an old story, apparently, although it’s one I hadn’t heard. Take a few minutes to watch the video. I think it conveys the message really well. Remember, we all get knocked down. That doesn’t make you a failure. It’s the not getting back up, that’s the real problem.

“Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan ‘Press On’ has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.” ~ Calvin Coolidge 

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” ~ Thomas Edison