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Exploring Potential in Personal Development

Focus on the good stuff!

October 21, 2017 Ken 0 Comments

I know I’ve said it before, and I’ll probably say it again, but that’s because it’s so important: you really do have to focus on the good stuff in your life. We tend not to, very often, and that’s because it has become habitual in our modern society to dwell on things that aren’t going too well, or things we have failed at, or things we feel we’re not doing properly, or adequately. It’s become so much of a habit that we don’t know we’re even doing it!

Why is this so bad? Because we do tend to get more of what we focus on, for one reason or another. And that means that if you focus on the fact that you always seem to be short of money, you’re very likely to perpetuate that exact state of affairs. In other words, moan about being short of money and you’ll find money even harder to come by.

If you moan about having no friends, the same thing happens – you’ll find yourself even more friendless. Focus on being hopeless at drawing and you’ll never get better at drawing … because you’ve convinced yourself you’re a hopeless artist.

I have a terrible memory for names … or at least I used to

With me, it’s memory. I’m embarrassed to say I run a memory improvement website, because I have so much trouble remembering people’s names. My memory for other things is pretty good, at least most of the time, and it’s spectacularly good for one or two things. Music, for example; I can’t play an instrument, but I have a pretty amazing memory for music. If I hear just a few bars of a track I last heard twenty or thirty years ago, it’s a pretty safe bet I’ll remember the music, and probably who recorded it too. Yet I can walk outside and not remember my neighbours’ names. Which is incredibly embarrassing, I can tell you.

So there’s basically nothing wrong with my memory, it’s just that it’s not working precisely to specifications. It can perform really well in some areas, though not so good in others. That proves it’s basically sound. But I’ve got into the habit of moaning (at least to myself) that my memory for names is horrendously bad. And that’s a terrible message to send to your subconscious! It’s a recipe for disaster.

So it has to stop. From now on, I’m cultivating a habit of telling myself that my memory (even for names) is not just good, it’s outstanding. If I do it often enough, and with enough self-belief, I’ll be reinforcing my belief that my memory is really reliable. And that’s a much healthier message to be sending to your subconscious mind!

What’s been holding you back?

Is there something you moan about? Something about yourself, I mean. Your memory, your attitude, your passion, your level of motivation … Is there something you could be getting better at, if your beliefs changed? Maybe you don’t consider yourself very good at learning languages? Or maybe you don’t see yourself as very self-confident? Whatever it might be that you have a downer on, maybe it’s time you got a grip of the situation and made a decision to bring about a massive change. If you don’t try, you’ll never know.

Why not start overhauling your internal dialogue and ditching all the negative self-talk? Why not start a habit of boosting your confidence in your abilities, instead of habitually chipping away at them? Who knows … maybe in six months time you’ll be quite a different person. Maybe you’ll be well on the way to becoming fluent in Italian, or Spanish, or Japanese. Or maybe you’ll be regularly drawing sketches, or caricatures, or landscapes, or cityscapes. Or maybe you’ll just have boosted your general level of self-confidence so much that there’ll seem to be no limits to what you could achieve.

All it takes is the strength and determination to make that leap … to make a decision, and start to generate regular and positive self-talk, and to start really believing in yourself. If you don’t, you can’t really expect anyone else to, can you?

Go on … what have you got to lose?

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#self belief#self image#self-confidence#subconscious

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